My IVF Success Story

There was a period of time when I was convinced I may never have children of my own. I felt helpless, defeated, and shamefully, jealous. Jealous of friends, jealous of acquaintances, and even jealous of strangers who were pregnant with no (apparent) conceiving issues. For they weren’t having to face the agony that I was enduring every month, when the test read negative and a period arrived quickly thereafter. 

Life certainly didn’t suck though. I found happiness in my loving husband, angelic dog (Kona), cozy home, supportive family and friends, stable career, vacations to Japan, Hawaii, and Europe and also, the beauty which surrounded me in Southern California.

Yet, I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that there was always a piece missing and every time I saw a pregnancy announcement, it was a quick and painful reminder of that missing piece.

It wasn’t just me carrying the burden. Chris felt the pressure and the pain each month too. He tried his damndest to conceal his disappointment but I always knew it was affecting him as well. 

The Journey Begins…

Chris and I were cautious with our TTC (trying to conceive) start date. After five years of dating and an engagement, we were married at 30 and had no immediate plans for pregnancy. We had some traveling we wanted to accomplish and we also wanted to feel more financially prepared for kids before we pulled the trigger.

Flash forward two years later, after an Italy and Greece vacation, better paying jobs, and some friends’ weddings thrown in the mix, we were ready. So, I downloaded a TTC app on my phone and our journey officially began. This was May of 2017.

I was eating healthy, working out regularly, and taking a prenatal vitamin. My stress levels were low-ish and besides the occasional ladies night out, I was being mindful of my alcohol consumption too. I was ready. 

The Loss

After seven months of trying, we were pregnant. We were beyond thrilled and I immediately told a few friends. I was blissful but in denial too. Then one day out of nowhere, at a very early five and a half weeks, I began spotting. So without hesitation, I called my OB, who assured me some light spotting was normal. But a couple days later, on a brisk walk with Kona, it got worse. So, I called my OB again. And four ultrasounds later, it was confirmed, I had miscarried. No heartbeat, no fetal pole. It was extremely early but still, I was devastated. I was also emotionally exhausted. Because with every ultrasound, I had held onto some hope.

Talk about good timing though – my birthday was the following week so festivities immediately distracted me from the loss. My brother and sister-in-law came into town for a visit and we lived it up, gallivanting all over LA, with booze a-flowing.

As soon as they left town and the distractions ended though, it got real again. I needed to deal with the miscarriage. Not just emotionally speaking – logistically speaking too. Instead of just waiting for everything to exit my body naturally, I elected to have a D&C, where everything would be quickly removed via a surgical procedure. While not a fun day at the hospital, it was painless as I was put under general anesthesia, and when I awoke, I could move on.

And so I did. I moved on, and soon, Chris and I began trying once again. My OB said it shouldn’t take long before I got pregnant again as it’s common to have an easier time conceiving after a recent pregnancy, regardless of loss. 

Getting Help + an Infertility Diagnosis 

Five months went by and nothing. I didn’t want to waste anymore time either. Plus, to our welcomed surprise, Chris’ new job came with fantastic fertility benefits, including IVF (in-vitro fertilization) coverage, which I figured would be our last resort should other treatments not work.

In October of 2018, with my OB’s recommendation, we began seeing a Reproductive Endocrinologist at an esteemed fertility office. With just one ultrasound, it was confirmed that I had Endometriosis. While this disease often cannot be diagnosed without keyhole laparoscopic surgery, it was very evident that the cyst on my right ovary was an endometriosis cyst, given its size, shape, and darkness in color. 

Truth is, I always knew I may have this gnarly disease that affects 1 out of every 10 women and often means extremely painful periods and of course, infertility. Long ago, when I was just 18, my gynecologist suspected I had it...but just put me on birth control to control the painful symptoms. I got off birth control at 27 years-old and didn’t notice the symptoms return so I just assumed maybe they were wrong with their suspicion. 

The disease essentially gets in the way of fertilization. With displaced tissue throughout the pelvis, attached to various reproductive organs, it can block fertilization. The inflammation that comes with the disease can also stress out the reproductive organs and even infringe on an embryo before it’s attached to the uterus.

Giving IUIs a shot

My doctor’s fertility plan for us would begin with three IUIs (Intrauterine Insemination) but first, an HSG (hysterosalpingogram) to see if my tubes were blocked. Let me tell you, that was a brutal 45-second procedure. Nothing could’ve prepare me for that pain. But, I got through it and the radiologist concluded that one of my tubes was partially blocked, likely a result of Endometriosis. 

We went on to try our first IUI in December. I was put on an oral ovarian stimulation drug called Letrozole for a couple of weeks to stimulate egg growth and once two of my egg follicles were mature, I was given an ovulation trigger shot, which essentially forces you to drop your mature egg(s). The next day, Chris went into the fertility office to umm, do his business (which is far more fun than anything I’ve done in this process) and just a couple of hours later, it was my turn. My doctor used a very long and skinny catheter to place Chris’ specially washed sperm inside my uterus, in hopes that it would fertilize one or both of my eggs.

A super easy and quick 10-minute procedure, the two weeks that followed were anything but. I tried my best to stay optimistic and distracted. 14 days went by and I returned to the office for blood work. I didn’t even need to wait for the nurse’s phone call that day though. I knew the answer was a big fat negative.

So we tried another IUI cycle, with the help of Gonal-F, a more intense ovarian stimulation drug that needed to be injected subcutaneously into my tummy. This was my first rodeo injecting myself at home, which made me nervous as hell but I was determined to do whatever it took. Plus, the needle was tiny, and the plunger was in a fool-proof twister pen-type case. This time around, I had three mature eggs to fertilize. But as you likely already know, this IUI did not work either.

And while we had originally planned on three IUIs, my gut was telling me to get started with IVF. Chris was 100% on board and so was my doctor too.

Enduring an IVF Egg Retrieval Cycle

And so it began. Our last resort was now a reality. 

I never anticipated that a single IVF cycle would take so long. But as it turns out, Endometriosis patients get modified (read: lengthier) timelines.

With the new year and new game plan, I added weekly acupuncture, herbs, and a strengthened, yet streamlined vitamin protocol to my fertility “regimen.” I know there are plenty of non-believers out there but I am gung-ho when it comes to acupuncture and strongly believe it contributed to the quality of my eggs and the success of my first frozen embryo transfer. 

(Western) medically speaking, we officially began the IVF journey in March. Up first – the egg retrieval cycle. It started with 3 weeks of birth control pills, which made me moody, bloated, and gain a few pounds too. But no big deal; that was the easy part. From there, we started with an ultrasound to see the number of eggs I’d be working with for my first (and hopefully only) egg retrieval surgery. My doctor saw 20-some eggs that day, which was a promising baseline.

And on day three of my cycle, I began injecting my stomach every night with very high doses of ovarian stimulation drugs (Gonal-F and Menopur). Gonal-F was an easy and tiny pinch but Menopur, which had to be mixed and drawn up, stung like absolute hell. I’d straight up dance around the bathroom while taking exaggerated deep breaths after it was over. Chris would not only stand by my side through all of this, he was also the one to draw up the needles and prep them for me each time. 

Around day 10 of injections, I added a third drug (Cetrotide) to my routine. This one prevented me from ovulating.

During all of this, I reported to the fertility office frequently for ultrasounds to monitor my eggs maturation. Meanwhile, my lower abdomen was growing larger and larger each day. My ovaries were HUGE as they were filled with TONS of egg follicles (think 20 grapes insides your ovaries versus the usual 1). I was extremely uncomfortable. Even peeing, sitting down, and walking around the house became tortuous towards the end. Fortunately, my emotions stayed in tact...which is an issue for many.

Just two days before the egg retrieval surgery I injected myself with trigger shots to promote ovulation. I cannot even begin to explain to you the discomfort at this point. I felt like a freaking cow with udders in desperate need of milking. 

Then the big day came. I was put under general anesthesia while my doctor used a crazy suction instrument to suck out all of my eggs. When I awoke, I was told that a whopping 33 eggs had been retrieved from my ovaries. My final ultrasound prior to the retrieval only showed like 18 mature follicles but there were several more eggs hiding behind that stupid cyst on my right ovary. 

33 eggs! I could hardly believe it. I was extremely grateful and my doc was shocked but pleased. But while this was wonderful news for conceiving, it put me at high risk for OHSS (ovarian hyper-stimaulation syndrome), which can land you in the hospital if you’re not careful with proper (strict) dieting following the retieval.

That same day, Chris’ individual sperm cells were “combined” with each one of my 33 eggs using a fancy forced fertilization technique called ICSI. (Intracytoplasmic sperm injection is a lab procedure where a single sperm cell is injected directly into the cytoplasm of an egg). The next day we were told that 21 of my eggs were successfully fertilized.

Waiting for Embryo Results

And for the next 12 days, per the OHSS prevention guidelines, I survived on a strict protein and veggie diet and quickly lost all the bloat plus a few pounds while I was at it. Hello, silver lining and who would’ve thought, I was bikini ready just in time for a Florida beach wedding! During this period of extreme dieting, I was also anxiously awaiting phone calls from the lab with reports on how our embryos were doing. 

Six days and three reports from the lab later, we had 12 surviving embryos that appeared normal under the microscope. We elected to have these 12 embryos taken to a third party lab for genetic testing (commonly known as PGS and or PGT) to weed out any with genetic mutations or abnormalities. This genetic testing is never covered by insurance and definitely isn’t cheap but at the end of the day, we decided it was worth it considering all we were going through to have a baby.

These test results took an additional 10 days – a very long 10 days. But when I finally received that phone call, I was elated to hear the great news. We had 7 perfectly normal embryos. 7 chances of pregnancy! Potentially 7 children! (kidding)

When my doctor followed up with me the next day, I asked her something I shouldn't have. “So...what are the genders?” I don’t know why I thought it would be an even-ish ratio. And if I did assume that, then why did I even ask? But I did. It was not an even ratio. 5-2, actually. So naturally, we planned on transferring one of the dominant five with our first IVF transfer.

Yes, we’ve known the gender since Day 1 and before that, really.

She also told me that I’d need to get back on birth control for 6-10 weeks before the IVF transfer process would begin. Ugh, birth control...again.

IVF Transfer

Flash forward 3 ½ months later thanks to lots of birth control, a uterine polyp removal surgery (more general anesthesia, yay!), a month of zen I opted to have afterwards (hello Paris, London, and Amsterdam vacation), and continued acupuncture, we were finally ready to begin the IVF transfer process, which is much easier and shorter than the egg retrieval process. I was to start oral estrogen (called Estrace) for 2-3 weeks in preparation for progesterone injections. This drug basically thickens your lining, which is necessary for implantation. Everyone warned me that Estrace was a bitch and would quickly turn me into one. Surprisingly, it didn’t. 

Almost 3 weeks later when my lining should have substantially thickened, I reported to my doctor’s office twice in one week for ultrasounds only to learn that my lining was not responding as well as we’d hoped to the Estrace. My Doctor suggested I stay on the Estrace another few days and we’d recheck my lining then with a final decision, that could mean cancelling the cycle entirely and starting from scratch the next month. I left the office in tears that day. I felt hopeless and defeated. There wasn’t an ounce of optimism in my body.

Something told me to call my acupuncturist though. And I’m so glad I did. Call it witch magic or total nonsense, but what she gave me that day worked. These charcoal sticks called “moxa sticks” were uterine lining life-savers. I burned them and waved them over my lower abdomen for 7 minutes, 3 times a day until my next ultrasound appointment. And sure enough, my lining was beautiful and ready with that last scan.

So with that, I continued the Estrace (estrogen) and also began the seriously scary and dreaded progesterone shots a few days later. These shots had to be injected intramuscularly and in this instance, that meant the upper quadrant of my glutes (ahem, bum). The needle for this injection was thick and long and made me anxious as hell just thinking about it (despite the many needles I’ve elected to have in my face over the years). But with an ice pack, a heating pad, and a husband with a gentle touch, they were tolerable…kinda.

I’d continue these shots through my IVF transfer day and at least until I got my blood test results 11 days after that. If positive, I’d continue the progesterone shots until 10-12 weeks. If negative, I’d stop them immediately.

Five days of anxiousness and five progesterone shots later and the BIG DAY had arrived. I had my acupuncturist scheduled to treat me before and after the transfer, in the room where the transfer took place. And following every transfer guide I read, I had also been drinking allllll the water in sight and noshing on pineapple core, Brazil nuts, tons of greens, and easily digestible fiber for the week prior. This was it. The emotions were insane and I left my expectations for the results at the door. Whatever was meant to be, would be.

That day seems like an eternity ago. It was quick and it was peaceful and now in hindsight, it just made sense that it worked. I had done everything right and was more ready than ever. With a 30-minute acupuncture session before the transfer, I held Chris’ hand as my doctor gave me the details on what would happen next. The laboratory scientist then came out and showed us what the embryo looked like from under the microscope on a screen. She pointed out that the embryo had completely hatched, which was an excellent sign of health and would aid in its implantation.

Just 5 minutes later, with a painless insertion of a soft and flexible catheter in my uterus, the embryo was “transferred.” I did 30 more minutes of acupuncture afterwards and then we went home, where I enjoyed bed rest (24/7 Netflix and chill) for the next 3 days. I watched funny movies and shows and per everything I’d read, ate all the hot soup, which I had prepared before the transfer. I also kept warm and cozy with sweats and fuzzy socks to ensure all the blood flow was with my uterus and not my limbs. I meditated, I slept, and I try my best to distract my mind.

The Results

If you’re still reading, kudos and thank you. This is the very best part. So 6 days after the transfer, Chris and I were off to Nashville for the weekend to explore, since we thought we may be moving here in the near-ish future. I still took it easy-ish but tried to enjoy it, sans the standard vacation cocktails. I had just a few days left till my blood work at the fertility office too so this distraction could not have come at a better time. 

But on the 3rd night of our Nashville getaway, I lost it. I couldn’t take the waiting game any longer. I just had to know. And truthfully, I was convinced I was not pregnant. So we drove to Walgreens and grabbed a couple at-home tests. The second we got back to our hotel, I went into the bathroom solo and peed on the stick. I couldn’t have Chris next to me – the pressure was already just too much.

When 2 minutes went by, I allowed myself to take a peek. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. The test read “pregnant.” I couldn’t even believe my eyes. I immediately choked up and then took a very deep breath before walking out of the bathroom. With test in hand, I looked at Chris with possibly the biggest smile he’s ever seen on my face. We hugged and I sobbed and it was truly the best night of my life. 

The following weeks were anxiety ridden but I pushed through with acupuncture and some CBD oil too. Weekly ultrasounds meant constant reassurance that our baby was progressing beautifully. Seeing the heartbeat at week 6 was incredible but hearing it at week 8 just about brought me to tears. “Graduating” from the fertility office at 10 weeks was also monumental but not near as life-changing as the day I was finally allowed to stop the progesterone shots, which happened around week 11.

The first trimester was intense and came with tons of doubt due to my own emotions and some normal spotting and cramping along the way too. The 2nd trimester still came with worry and wasn’t until my 20-week anatomy scan that I could finally take a very deep breath. I’m now at 27 weeks and feel this baby moving constantly. Emotionally, I am so ready to mother our “JB” (gender and name to come) but logistically, we’ve still got lots to do in the next 3 months.

I cannot even begin to tell you how precious this baby is and how special it is for me to be able to write this blog post. It has been one hell of a journey and I know so many are not near as fortunate. I remind myself of that daily. I can only pray though, that those of you who are on the IVF horizon will get both hope and knowledge from all of this and that your friends and family will read it too, so they are educated when they talk to you about it. A support system is vital during this time and I’m extremely blessed to have had all my friends and family cheering us on. We are so lucky and will remember that for the rest of our lives.